Going Under
by XsesenX
Summary: Spinner/Marco slash. Marco has issues at home, and has one person to turn to. Spinner. Songfic to "Going Under" by Evanescence.
1. Prolouge

"Going Under"  
  
By: Sesen ObsidianMoon  
  
Site: http://www.lizzieandgordo.cjb.net  
  
Journal: http://www.blurty.com/users/me221  
  
eMAIL: Lalaine_rawks@yahoo.com  
  
Distribution: Sure, just ask me first  
  
Feedback: Yes, please! Flames will be used to roast marshmallows.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. Or any of the characters mentioned. Nor do I own the song "Going Under". That belongs to Evanescence.  
  
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SPINNER'S POV (Whole story)  
  
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[A/N: I LOATHE POV changes, but I feel this one's necessary.] I went through another uneventful day at school. I of course only liked Media Immersion. We had a free period - the software Mr. Simpson ordered wasn't shipped yet - but we had to stay in our seats. Marco & I got a direct connection, and spent most of the period talking.  
  
Spinner: hey  
  
BaddaBoom: hi  
  
Spinner: i saw you talking to ashley this morning. what'd she have 2 say?  
  
BaddaBoom: Nothing too much. We were both early, so we just started talking.  
  
Spinner: look man. i talked to ashley online this morning, and i realized that all that shit i said about you being gay was way outta line. sorry man.  
  
I saw a small smile creep over Marco's face.  
  
BaddaBoom: No hard feelings man.   
  
Spinner: cool. so, wanna play some bball with me jimmy and craig after school?  
  
BaddaBoom: What about Sean?  
  
Spinner: .......  
  
Spinner: what about him?  
  
BaddaBoom: Doesn't he usually play with us? It's just odd for him to pass on playing.  
  
Spinner: two words. emma nelson.  
  
BaddaBoom: Figures. I wonder if since he's dating Mr. Simpson's step-daughter if he can swing for some A's on our parts...  
  
Spinner: I wish.  
  
BaddaBoom: Lol... shit, my connections dropping. I'll talk to you l8r.  
  
BaddaBoom signed off 1:35:12 PM.  
  
I got home from the store at around 5. Me and the guys only got to play one quick game before Craig had to be at work. Then Jimmy had to go home to help his dad make dinner for his parents anniversary. I thought this was weird. I mean, his rents are never home. Oh well. So Marco an I walked home together, after playing some quick one on one.  
  
I took the cordless phone from the kitchen, ignoring Kendra's complaints. I feel bad about being so rude to her, but I really hoped Marco would call. I think he really is gay... so, why aren't I more freaked out about it? I mean, possibly my best friend - besides Jimmy - is gay, and I don't care. Okay, so this morning I thought I was falling for Marco, but come on... this is Marco. I don't like him... right? I mean... oh shit. I don't even know.  
  
The phone rang. I quickly picked it up, hoping the nervousness in my voice didn't show. "Hello?"  
  
"Spinner? I-it's Marco."  
  
I smiled. Sometimes, you have to thank man for not advancing really far in technology. "Hey, what's up?"   
  
"I really need to talk to you."  
  
His voice was shaking. I didn't know what was going on. What happened, who died? "What's wrong? Is everything okay?"  
  
"Yeah, I just really need to talk to you."  
  
"Okay, What's up?"  
  
"In person."  
  
"Um, okay... I'll be right over. Bye." I imagined how confused I must have sounded, but I didn't care. I hung up the phone, and grabbed my coat. I called to Kendra that I was going out, and began the walk to Marco's house. But what I saw when I got there frightened me beyond words. Marco was sitting at the curb, with a duffel bag. His face was bruised, and he just looked... broken. He didn't look like the confident person I know. He looked lost, confused. Dazed. He was crying, tear dracks running down his face. Some dry, some fresh. "Marco..." I whispered, mostly to myself, and then ran over to him. "Marco... are you okay? What happened, what's going o-"  
  
"Please, just... let me explain later. Please, just get me out of here." His chocolate eyes were wet and pleading.   
  
I just nodded, without even thinking, and helped him stand. It looked at if his ankle was sprained... maybe even broken. He could barely stand. I took his bag with one arm, and put on of his arms around my shoulder. I walked him slowly but surley to my house, and knocked on the door. I was greeted by Kendra, who gasped.  
  
"Oh my... God, what happened?!"   
  
I pushed past her into the living room. "I don't know, but you need to get me the first aid kit." Kendra did as she was told, and I placed Marco on the couch. He went to lay down but I stopped him. He winced in pain. "Marco, listen to me. You're gonna have to site up, okay? I can't wrap your ankle if your laying down." I placed a pillow behind his head so he could be a little comfortable. I put his foot on the ottoman, and rolled his pant leg up. I quickly removed the sandal he was wearing, as Kendra returned with bags of ice, and the first aid kit. "Okay, put a bag of ice on his eye, and his lip." she did as she was told, and then stood there, anxious. I wrapped his ankle, hoping it was just a sprain, or he was going to be in even more pain. "Marco, come on... just help me a bit. What else hurts?"  
  
"Sh-shoulder. I c-can't move it." He tried to, and took in a deep breath. Why did it hurt me so much to see him in this much pain?  
  
"Marco... you're gonna have to help me here. You need to take your shirt off." I helped him remove his shirt, and seeing his physique bruised in several deep shades of purple, back, blue, and yellow... it made me want to kill whoever did this to him. I helped his arm into a cheap sling, and placed some ice beneath his shoulder blade. "Okay... here, just lay down, alright..." Marco slipped into unconciousness, and I looked up at Kendra. "Keep an eye on him. I'm gonna go call mom."   
  
Kendra gave me a knowing look. "So much for Michaelchuk, eh Spin?"  
  
I smiled at her. We always knew eachothers deepest secrets without even saying anything. "Just keep an eye on him." I walked into the kitchen, and picked up the phone. My mom wasn't answering her cell phone. I knew I couldn't call her at work. She'd already be on her way home. I sighed, and walked back into the living room. "Okay, I'm gonna stay out here tonight, you can go to bed."  
  
"'Kay. Night, Spin."  
  
"G'night, Kendra." I watched her go upstairs, and enter her room. I looked over at Marco one last time. Kendra had placedd a blanket over him. At least I didn't have to see those horrible bruises again. I turned to the chair, and settled in for the night.  
  
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I woke up to a loud thud the next morning. I looked around the room. Marco was gone. I immediately started panicking. I jumped up, and began searching the house. The den, nope. My parents' office, nope. But in the kitchen I found "Marco!" He was sprawled out on the floor, knife in one hand.  
  
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AH!!! I know it sucked, but I wanted Marco to try to kill himself. 


	2. Going Under

"Going Under"  
  
By: Sesen ObsidianMoon  
  
Site: http://www.lizzieandgordo.cjb.net  
  
Journal: http://www.blurty.com/users/me221  
  
eMAIL: Lalaine_rawks@yahoo.com  
  
Distribution: Sure, just ask me first  
  
Feedback: Yes, please! Flames will be used to roast marshmallows.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. Or any of the characters mentioned. Nor do I own the song "Going Under". That belongs to Evanescence.  
  
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Kendra had called 911. My mom drove me to the hospital. It was a school day, but she let me take the day off. I was sitting in the waiting room, hoping for good news. If Marco died... I took a deep breath, and it hit me: I really care about Marco. The way his chocolate eyes looked at everyone at once. The way he did his hair, the way he walked... and then I realized. I'm in love with Marco Del Rossi. And he could die today.   
  
[Now I will tell you what I've done for you/Fifty thousand tears I've cried]  
  
Now I regret having made fun of Marco for being gay. I tried to tell him a million times I was joking and didn't mean it, but he wouldn't even listen to me.  
  
[Screaming, decieving, and bleeding for you/And you still won't hear me]  
  
I wish Marco could just let me know what I can do to make it better... to make him listen to me. Or maybe to just tell him that he isn't alone, that I'm here for him, and I want to be with him. The nurse interrupted my thoughts.   
  
"You can go back there now." I nodded, and began the walk down the long, white corridor. I hate hospitals...   
  
[Going under]  
  
I arrived at his door, and knocked. "Come in." Marco sounded exhausted. When I walked in, he looked at me angrily. "Get out."  
  
[Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself/Maybe I'll wake up for once]  
  
"Marco, you need to listen to me-"  
  
"GET. OUT." I stood in the doorway, Marco's eyes shooting daggers my way.  
  
[Not tormented daily defetated by you/Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom]  
  
"No! Dammit, Marco, you need me."  
  
He looked away from me. "I don't need anyone."  
  
[I'm dying again]  
  
"You may not need me, but I need you."  
  
[I'm going under/Drowning in you]  
  
He didn't even look back at me, he just kept staring at the window.   
  
[I'm falling forever]  
  
"Why?"  
  
"What?"   
  
I sighed, and then looked at him. I noticed that his whole right arm was covered in bandages. It was his left that his father had hurt. "Why did you do this?! I thought you were okay, you TOLD me you were okay. I thought you could count on me, I thought... I thought you felt like you could trust me."  
  
[I've got to break through/I'm going under]  
  
Marco looked at me. "Spin, I don't know anything anymore."   
  
[Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies/So I don't know what's real and what's not]  
  
I sank into the chair next to his cot, and looked at him. "You can trust me, Marco."  
  
"My dad just tried to kill me. I don't know if I can trust anyone."  
  
[Always confusing the thoughts in my head/So I can't trust myself anymore]  
  
"Look, I know you won't listen to me, but try, okay?" I took in a deep breath, trying to figure out how to say it. "I know that you have no real reason to trust me. But when you needed me, I went. So I think you at least owe me something."  
  
"Fine. Next time I'll just let my dad kill me. It'd save me the trouble of doing it myself."  
  
[I'm dying again]  
  
"We all die. But you shouldn't die this young. Not if you don't have to. Marco, you have stuff to live for. You have me, and Ellie, and Jimmy, and Craig, and Sean... you have people, Marco."  
  
[I'm going under/Drowning in you]  
  
"I just feel so empty. You know how you core an apple? You just dig out the middle. If you look at that apple from most people's perspective, it still looks perfect. You'd have no idea if it was empty. That's how I am. People would have never guessed that I died."  
  
[I'm falling forever/I've got to break through]  
  
"Marco, please, just let me help you. I want you to be okay-"  
  
"You couldn't care less." He looked at the windowsill, his eyes downcast and away from me.   
  
"Dammit, Marco!!! You ARE important to me!"  
  
[So go on and screm/Scream at me I'm so far away]  
  
"Spin, you said a while ago that you didn't know what you'd do if one of your friends was gay. Well, I am."  
  
I finally sat. Marco was gay... but, what if he didn't feel that way about me? "Marco... I don't know how to put this, so if it doesn't make sense, give me a break." I took a deep breath. "I don't know if I'm gay. I mean, I'm not attracted to guys, but I am attracted to certain ones. The really special ones. As a matter of fact, there is only one. I think you know him. His name is Marco Del Rossi?"  
  
He turned, and began saying something, but I took advantage of this angle, and kissed him.  
  
[I won't be broken again/I've got to breathe I can't keep going under]  
  
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~Fin.   
  
I origianally wanted this to be a one-chapter songfic, but the song fits better in this chapter. So the first part was just an into. And this also originally was part of my fic, "Becoming", but I didn't like it like that. "Becoming" should be updated soon. Sesen. 


End file.
